September 19, 2007
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WHAT I DID ON MY SUMMER VACATION
I have a confession to make. During my hiatus from Xanga I wasn’t actually holed up in a Mexican prison on bizarre animal molestation charges (at least not for the whole summer).
In reality I was…
…working on a series of “House of Bush” action figures including; Rumsfeld, Gonzales, and Rove.The figures were the type that say something when you pull a cord with a ring on it. Rumsfeld said “I don’t do diplomacy,” Gonzales said “I don’t recall,” and Rove just laughed like Satan. The problem was that they only worked if Bush pulled their string. <rimshot>
Ok, that’s not really what I’ve been doing.
In reality I was…
…working as a script writer for OJ’s new live-action drama set in Las Vegas. My riveting script has been getting a lot of air play and I’m a little worried about it getting stolen. So just let me say that if any of you motherf*&*rs think you can steal my sh*t and get a way with it, I’m going to back your motherf%$#ing a$$ up against the wall and put a bullet in your motherf&*#ing head.
Ok, that’s not really what I’ve been doing.
In reality I was…
…making a video tape in which I express my displeasure over the mistreatment of the greatest gift ever given to the world.
Ok, Ok, Ok…that’s not really what I’ve been doing.
In reality I was…
Working.
I wish it could be something more glamorous than that, but it is what it is. I think I’ve mentioned that my sales for last year SUCKED. Well, this year I’ve been able to turn that around. The problem with the contracting business is that once you sell something, you actually have to do the work. The last three or four months have been a nightmare. I shouldn’t complain; I can actually afford to eat most of the time now, but our company’s resources have been stretched to the point that we’ve had to perform several company-wide episiotomies just to get through the summer.
I could have easily worked 100-hour weeks all summer long and still not made a dent in what needed to be done. There were a couple of times this summer I almost walked off the job never to return, but my mortgage holder kept calling me to remind me that it probably wasn’t a good idea.
The stress at work has been slowly turning me into someone I don’t like very much, and I’ll probably write more about that later. However, the good news is that we are in a short lull in the storm and I’m beginning to feel more like myself again…
…a truly juvenile and sophomoric excuse for an adult male.
I want to say thank you to everyone who has encouraged (threatened) me to come back to Xangaland. I’ve missed it, and I’ve missed all of you.
Comments (40)
::faints::
You are back AND I am first! Yay! Glad to see you back, Mark, and that your humor remained intact throughout the rough sales season. Happy that things are looking up for you!
Kathi
Yay! I’m the first one to welcome you back! Missed you too!
Grrr! Kathy beat me to it! Okay, I’m the second one!
welcome back!
t
About flippin’ time.
Nice to see you back…..There’s only a few people on Xanga that I trust with my funny bone, and you’re one of the few.
Um…nice video.
glad you’re back -
Hi! Welcome back!!
Welcome back…love your alternative vacations. Pick one….hope you turn back into someone you like!
Welcome back! Can some of that good sales-fortune rub off on me? I’d like to quit one of the two extra jobs I’ve taken because real estate sales in Michigan sux…. I would have loved to take the summer off, but I’ve been here all along… waiting… and waiting…
Well, your readers are back too and we are ready to hear what you’ve got to say! Welcome back! Hopefully xanga can take away some of your stress!
thank god, someone else who appreciates Chris Crocker’s pain.
although his commentary on britney has nothing in sarah silverman.
See there…. threats still do work. Just ask OJ. Speaking of OJ…any thoughts on that topic???
LOL. Welcome back.
I don’t have sound on my computer, but I’m guessing (I can read lips somewhat) that that may be the infamous “Leave Britney Spears Alone” video I’ve heard about? Hm…And we never knew. Some kind of eyeliner you have going on, there.
You use more than I do, I can say that.
Welcome back!! Too bad the dolls aren’t real. That would make one heckuva gag gift.
-Angel
I have to wonder what Britney thinks of that video….
RYC: Yes indeedy. (…I think my mean bone is showing today! The poor girl is having a bad year; I ought to understand about a “bad year”…)
Welcome back!
Well, work is a four letter word.
YAY!!YAY!!YAY!! Let the feast begin! (Heck, any excuse to feast…)
Welcome back, yes, but are you going to be more than six letter words now?. I am not that smart episiotomies? OK you made that up!
Well, hallelujah! I now have someone to entertain me during my ass-numbingly dull law classes! We’ve missed you…glad to have you back!
welcome back ^_^
You are SO welcomed back and that video was beyond funny. I am sending it to everyone I know.
I noticed that you were way down on my list….
Welcome back!! I did NOT make it first….according to the counter, I will be like 26th….but it doesn’t mean I wasn’t thinking about you….I started back at my old job in July…..Stress??? Yes, I completely understand. It’s so good to have you back….in fact, in the midst of my horribley awful day, I saw the message that you were back….and it made me smile. Thank you…I SO needed that today.
I actually understand. I had major, major work stress in the summer of 2006, which actually caused me to pack up and walk out of a good job (that I basically loved) in August 2006. It has been a year now, I have a new job that really like, my stress level has gone from a 10 to a 2, but now I have the health insurance problem. So you just have to weigh the pros and cons and go with your gut. Xanga is a stress reliever for me, but that’s because I don’t try to leave 300 comments when I get featured. Yeah, I got featured. In my dreams.
Just because you are back (my original Mark) does not mean I can give up my new bad habit, Mark Lupton. He got me through that long, dry spell without you! You owe him a beer.
Welcome back!
And I’ll be honest. That video kind of scared me. I was a little afraid that kid was going to go all horror movie and crawl out of the screen to kill people, haha! Wow…
Welcome back! The video made the wait worthwhile!!! lol
Bring it on, my man! Stress, what stress?
Is there any end in sight to the work? Good to see you on here.
Woa, your video is really heartfelt. You tell ‘em, girlfriend.
Welcum back. Sorry to hear about work, but it seems about normal. My hubbys job is the same way, but more so cuz his boss really lacks the skills of running an construction company and has no clue how to handle jobs or payroll. But really what do i know I’m just a stay at home mom running a damn houe like a business lol.
No matter what glad yourback and look forward to reading what you got to say
Nieza
“company-wide episiotomies”? Thanks for that visual.
Welcome back, Mark.
xoxoxo
Welcome back! That video is a bit…..disturbing, truth be told.
Glad your hiatus is over…
Yahoooo, Yipeeee, Woooohooo!!! You are back!!!!
Smiles!!!
yeeeeeeh!! You’re back.
I’ve been taking a hiatus too, and I hope I’m back
Nice to see you! Now get back to work.
i’m glad you’re back! your xanga is one of the best i’ve read, ever.