January 25, 2007
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For those of you who remember my post about the upcoming sales meeting I was dreading, I’m sitting in that meeting right now. I’m currently listening to a report on tax code policies by our CFO. If I had a gun, I swear to God I’d shoot myself.
I did my presentation earlier this morning. I did a little soft shoe, a little juggling, a little slight-of-hand, and spread a lot of verbal fertilizer. I’m glad to report that it’s over and that it went well. I’m also glad to report that in the month of January I’ve already surpassed all of 2006. That says two things: first, it was a good January and secondly, 2006 royally sucked.
The awards banquet is tonight. I certainly won’t be receiving any awards for 2006 unless, of course, they plan to give an award for the largest amount of alcohol consumed during the banquet.
But that’s ok. I’ll sit back, let the new guys shine, and smile and pat them on the back while I’m secretly seething inside and plotting their demise.
I took a photo of our corporate training room during a break a few minutes ago. Notice that the few people who are left in the room are all on their laptops searching for new jobs on monster.com.
Well, I’d better stop typing and start listening. God knows I don’t want to miss the upcoming segment on personal hygiene tips for making cold calls.
Comments (25)
Oh geez! I hate those stuffy hotel convention center meetings. Everyone has the same pad of paper, the same type of pen, and the same pitcher of vile ice water. Ick. The material is usually very dry because presenters are not educated on being entertaining, merely delivering informaiton. Borrrrrrrrrrrrrring.
Ah, what a wonderful world we live in!
ROFL!! at those searching for new jobs. I know you were joking but it still gave me a hearty laugh because they could be….
LOL…you crack me up! It can’t be too bad if you are able to be on your computer & type a post out! *I am ducking my head now so I can miss that bullet you are shooting at me!
hang in there…it will be history soon…
LOL we had such a crapy year we only gave out 3 awards and they were a stretch
So, I don’t need to hold an eighteen wheeler open for you ?
And we want pics of the alcohol award.
I guess the salesman’s life is not as glamorous as it’s cracked up to be.
Let’s hope my 2007 success mimics yours… My 2006 sales here in real estate (Michigan) truly sucked as well. I’ve already put a sale on the board for this month – it can only get better, eh?
(And yes, sales meetings are not my idea of dollar productive activity — shoot, I wish I could take my laptop into the meetings to google boredom!)
WHAT? I sent you $10,000,000,000.00 in cash in an unmarked envelope so that you could sneak it into the corporate till as a big sale in your name so you could get out of the drudgery of being anything but first place. Are you trying to tell me its lost in the mail? Oh the horror.
you’ve been drive-by-”hi”-ed (…is that even a comprehensible concept?)
reeeally busy but trying to keep up and *had* to send you a shout-out.
*laces up running shoes*
okay. i’m out again.
ciao!
peiganjan
Where’s the cyanide capsule when you need it?
(A crossword puzzle might be a tad less permanent.)
Gee, I’m also glad you don’t have a gun. Your co-workers might want to borrow it, too. If that speaker is as boring as he looks, there could be trouble!
Glad 2007 is zipping right past 2006. My husband is in sales, and he felt the same way about last year.
Kathi
I’m so glad you don’t have a gun. I would miss you and your funny posts.
Hope the rest of your week goes well!
I’ve found that it helps to imagine the dead body…
Gosh, that looks like a good time.
Hahaha, this reminds me of when Jordan used to Xanga during colloquium – and I thought he was studiously taking notes. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree…
Can the people behind you see what you’re really doing? Just curious.
And y’know, if you stab yourself in the hand with a pen… you can plead a medical emergency and leave.
I feel your pain–today was a “teacher workday” which means I got no work done because I had to listen to some state drone prattle on for hours about how to incorporate $hit into my classroom, which is pointless because my classroom is already full of it–I’m the teacher, aren’t I?
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Oh, wow, can you send me a copy? My Ambien quit working.
wow sounds fascinating! what kind of widgets do you sell?
Sorry!
I stumbled on here by accident.
I was google searching for “Personal hygiene tips for clearing up cold sores from call girls”.
My bad : )
Well, as a stay at home mom, I thought the photo was very interesting! Thanks for including it! I love your humor! Few people have original funny material. You should take your show on the road…maybe it would pay even better than sales!
That’s pretty funny….sad..but funny and true.
RYC…. AHHHH someone who finally gets it — it has been a mantra of my family forever but most do not get it
RYC: Dont kid yourself if not for Miss Clairol mine would be all gray too! PHOOEY, aging stinks.