April 27, 2007
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MAN-DRAMA
A few years ago, Bishop T.D. Jakes, the pastor of a 73 bazillion member mega-church in Dallas wrote a book called “He-Motions.” I haven’t actually read the book because: A) it’s written by the pastor of 73 bazillion member mega-church, and B) it’s a self-help book, and I’d rather chew glass than read a book in either category, let alone one that falls into both.
Jakes is an impressive man, and I’m sure the book is very good, but the title cracks me up. A blurb I read on the book states: “Men feel the pressure of fulfilling many roles in life: husband, father, son, businessman, and leader. Now Bishop Jakes comes to their aid with this guidebook to help every man understand his own emotional inner workings”
Wait a minute! Men have emotional inner workings?
I realize the prevailing cultural paradigm is that men are stoic creatures, devoid of emotion, and not given to petty drama.
I doubt if Jakes uses this specific “term” in his book, but the prevailing cultural paradigm is “bullshit.” In the drama category, a group of grown men can put a group of 13 year old girls to shame; they would just rather die than admit it.
This subject is on my mind because I’ve currently gotten put in the middle of two different “man-dramas.” In both situations someone said something that someone else took offense too and everyone involved has gotten their panties in a wad. Those panties are actually big, nasty, skid-marked boxer shorts, but they are wadded none the less. Tempers have flared, characters have been assassinated, and everyone involved has threatened to take their toys and go home.
The good news is that man-dramas don’t usually last very long. No one ever admits they are wrong or apologizes; they just get tired of it and move on. When a man wants to “make up” with another man, he simply observes the time honored tradition of walking up to the other man and making a flatulence joke. If the other man responds with a limerick about a girl from Nantucket the relationship is immediately restored.
Don’t get me wrong, I see nothing wrong with this tradition and I’m certainly not advocating the modern “sensitive” man. In fact, I’ve had all the sensitivity I can stand over the last few days and I’m ready for all of this man-drama to come to an end.
Now if you’ll excuse me, the guy in the office next to me just told me he didn’t like my shoes, and I need to close my door and pout.
Comments (24)
hey, if I hurry I can be the first this time to say how well-stated and cleverly ‘explained’ your point is here. I hope a comparison to Roy Blount and Dave Barry, the two in this genre I remember from before I left the West, is taken as I intended, a high compliment.
.. oh yeah, and when a man (me, for example) see’s a profile-pix of another man playing the piano, he often checks the ‘audio’ tab. Nu? I put mine out there, now it’s your turn, haha./ js/tel aviv
Yeah. Man-drama beats middle school drama every time.
OK………..tell all the guys as follows…”Put your big girl panties on and just deal with it”!
Just too funny!!! “Man-drama”!!!
Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok, I’ve stopped laughing….bwahahahahahaha….wait, I’ll pull myself together in a sec….twidder, giggle, bwhahahahahah! Panties in a wad…….bwhahahahahahahaha…ok, I’m alright now…..
It’s wonderful for us drama queens to finally see the “male” perspective. Next time my hubby looks at me “funny”…you know the look…I just tell him I’m on to him!!!!!!!
Glo
P.S. I must confess to stealing your post, (yes, I’m a klepto), to share with my non-blogging friends.
I would still much rather be around men drama than female drama, or much worse, the teenage drama!
This is good, guys do feel, they’d die rather than admit it (explains heart attack frequency), they move on and consider that making up, and the whole sensitivty paradigm is bs. But I’ve heard it said that when guys are PO’ed at one another, they don’t let it go so far into personal disrespect as women do. Guys have some lines wired in that they do not cross. Or maybe that’s just more compost.
well,I’m glad you guys are getting in touch with your feelings.
I’ve plenty of emotions and feelings. Anger, confusion, self-loathing, depression, it’s all a typical thing for me.
Whenever I am stoic, I don’t cherish it as much as I should.
Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to fuck up.
It has been my observation that man-dramas that involve anger are permissible. Nobody seems to have a problem when that conflict occurs. Anything dealing with pouting, tears, or whining is where man-dramas resemble woman-dramas. Betcha don’t see too many of those in males past the age of 5.
LMAO!….When I worked in a hospital setting as an RN, the “drama” from the male doctors was unreal!…the female doctors and the nurses would run and grab coffee and sit at the nurses desk for front row seats to all the drama and puffing of chests!…it was great!
By the way, I have the EXACT SAME DOOR, the very same one that I helped my hubby install 5 years ago,….3 times! LOL…ours is mahogoney, yours looks like it may be oak, you do know what kind of wood it is, right?
haha! men and women are more alike than once thought, aye?
What about fourteen-year-old girls?
I’m sure your shoes are amazing.
I work with six other women, and about 25 guys.
I really don’t know which group has more drama… It’s actually fun to watch sometimes.
I didn’t realize the was such a thing as man-drama. I thought you guys just punched each other out and then moved on, business as usual.
I love it, it’s so true. And I like how men make friends by beating the soot out of eachother either verbally or literally. For your next entry you can talk about how men are the real gossips
For some reason, your post made me think of the Promise Keepers, and a joke at the time that said: “Leave it to a man to want a trophy for keeping his word.”
And an incident from high school (yes, I can remember back that far): In one class we were split into two groups – males and females – and given some piddly-ass assignment to do. It took no time at all, and the rest of the class was free time. The girls sat and discussed upcoming tests in other classes, homework, and other things of that ilk (Look !! I used the word “ilk” !!), while the boys gossiped about other boys. The point was that girls have the rep for doing the gossiping, but the boys actually did more of it. The teacher pointed this out at the end of the class.
Is there a point to this ? No, not really. Have a great weekend !!
Skid-marked???? Ewww!
HAHA
that was awesome – so well said
Don’t tell me these girls, er guys, are going to be my new co-workers.
I’ve heard it said by a certain “church” group that women wearing jeans is the reason for homosexuality, maybe its actually the oversensitive man thing that’s causing it!
I see alot of drama where I work to…men and women alike. Nice piece. I know my shoes could use a replacement, they are falling apart as I work.
I’m trying to figure out how women make up, but all that comes to mind is how my mother used to make up with anybody she was mad at. She’d hold a grudge for 30 or 40 years; they’d hold a grudge for 30 or 40 years, and now they are all dead. Of course, even though this is not politically correct, she came from the same ethic group as the Italian Across the Street and he’s a man, so in that particular European country, the one with the really good food but which shall remain nameless, people hold grudges until they die, and that’s just the way it is. So I don’t think it’s a man-woman thing, I think it is your roots.
Thanks for the visual on the man-panties….eww..
I have a 20 year old son and a 21 year old daughter. I get a taste of both of those worlds. Boys are so different from girls. Thank goodness for that.